Thanks Rochelle for hosting. All links can be found here.
Walt looked over everything in the shop.
Nothing but trash, he thought. Who would pay for someone else’s junk?
All the whites were stained-over yellow, dust was several inches thick.
Place looked better from the street.
“Can I help you with something?” the owner asked.
“Help me? ‘Cause I have a cane I need help?” Walt barked.
“No, sir. It’s just what I ask customers in my store.”
“Sonny, if I need help, I wouldn’t ask you.”
The owner lit up a cigarette.
“You can’t smoke in here!” Walt shouted.
“Read the sign, old man. It says second hand.”
Oh, dear… Clever twist. Groaning over here… 😉
Groaning is good.
Aha! Tom! This was so good. I’ve love Walt! Oh he’s a character. It’s so funny how a lot of old guys turn out just like him. And you’re ending really hit the spot!
I think the owner is going to turn out the same way.
Thanks I love Walt too.
Tom
and a second hand attitude to go with the whites stained yellow
I like it Tom
Thanks just having a little fun this week.
Walt is quite a character. Loved him and the ending.
Thanks.
Drat, the good stuff’s already been said! Love your twist, Tom, and the story was lots of fun.
janet
Thank you Janet!
Guess that’s the ultimate in secondhand–no wonder everything was stained. Fun vignette.
Thanks.
Dear Tom,
I’m choking on the cigarette smoke. Now I’ll exit laughing. Good one.
shalom,
Rochelle
PS Sorry no crit. Just liked it. 😉
No Crit! I guess I will have to live with it! Glad you liked it.
Tom PPPP!!! Oh this one made me laugh. Old Walt and I would be great friends. Minus the second hand smoke. 😉
Thanks Jackie PPPPP! Happy to make you laugh.
Tom PPPP
I’m gonna be just like Walt when I get old. Cranky know-it-all critiquing the junk store. Nicely done, Sir.
Thanks!
Good twist. Boy that man sounds grumpy!
LOL he is a bit grumpy!
Dear Tom,
Do you smoke? I was wondering because you steered the conversation so adroitly. Walt sounds like a curmudgeon or three that I know from my New Jersey days. The owner needs to have a trap door for 86’ing quickly and quietly, customers like him.
Goo djob painting him in such vivid strokes.
Aloha,
Doug
I had it planned that way. I was gonna show him lighting the smoke out of frustration but I ran out of words.
Tom
Haha. I loved the dynamic between the crotchety old man and the rebellious young man. Very clever dialogue and great ending. I could see this conversation and the actions taking place in real life. Super job.
Thank you so much…I like super!
I have to admit, it took me a long pause to get the second-hand smoke dig at the end. But what a good dig! One way to get the grumpy, old man out of the store. And I have to admit that I liked the testy dialogue between the two… I wouldn’t complain if Walt showed up in other stories. 🙂
Dave,
I could see Walt in a few stories…something to think about. Glad you liked the testy dialogue, it seems to come naturally for me.
Tom
Clever little twist. Grumpy characters, the pair of them! 🙂
Thanks!
Hi Tom,
That’s a vivid curmudgeonly character you’ve created. You infused a lot of life into a still photo. Next time I’m in your neighborhood, I’d like to go to the bar where Jack hung out. I’ve been to the bar in Oakland that was Jack London’s haunt and the whole place is slanted and unlevel because of the earthquake and it’s right on the bay. Ron
Ron,
I didn’t know you came out this way. I would be happy to show you around when you are in my neck of the woods. I have been living on Long Island for 45 years and it would be a pleasure to show you some of the cool spots. Walt Whitman’s Home, what’s left of the gold coast mansions, where the battle of Long Island took place..you name it. That bar in Oakland sounds perfect to me. Thanks for the fine comments.
Tom
Nice twist.
Thank You.
Ha. I love this. When I see secondhand, I think of smoke too. It’s been so entrenched in mind. Great dialogue, Tom. I wouldn’t want to make Walt upset.
Walt is one grumpy old dude for sure. Thanks!
They are almost like father and son in a way… great dialogue.
The shop owner is looking at his future self. Nice!
I’ve been trying to fine tune my grumpiness as I get older. It’s a lot of work, but those young whippersnappers deserve a good cussing now and then.
AHHHH HA the whippersnappers. Love that word. You’ll be fine Russell!
Now we know why the white is stained with yellow…Too funny!
Thank you.
Wow !!!